Nattie Writes

29 years and holding…forever.

Nattie’s little girl is 12 years old, five-foot tall, and almost as beautiful as her angel mom.

She is also an Honor Roll student who enjoys reading and journaling.

Oh, dear…

(Photo by Grandma Mary)

This is where I feel compelled—even obligated—to write wisdom and inspiration. But each year I come up empty. So, again, I can only thank each of you for your wisdom and inspiration, love and support. Words cannot express the gratitude I feel when I read your recollections of times spent with Natalie Rose, and your tributes to her memory.

I thank God for all of the memories. Some are heartbreaking, but many are quite good.

Proud to be Natie’s Daddy.

I can’t think of many words that haven’t been said already. But it doesn’t seem possible that this is the fifth year we’ve had to celebrate your birthday without you. Or that it was 38 years ago tonight that we welcomed you into the world. And the nurse handed you, to your mother and asked us, “What’s her name?”

And the next day I sat in the hospital room, held you and watched some guy they called “Juice” set a new NFL season rushing record.

That was a much happier time. Or more innocent. Maybe ignorance truly is bliss.

But we know you no longer feel the pains of the body you left behind. And you probably saw Wes move the family so Jonathan and Anna could attend better schools. They seem to be thriving, making new friends, and growing like Hoosier corn in the summertime.

That makes us all happy.

We love you, and will miss you terribly…until we meet again.

Daddy

…to all of you from Natalie’s family. Thank you for all you have done to welcome us into your hearts. Just as you did for our Nattie.
May all your kindness be returned a hundredfold. God bless!
’til we meet again…{{{{{Y’all!}}}}}

(Originally published on Thursday, June 21, 2007)
Thank you (have I said that before?) for continuing to visit NattieRoseWrites.com. I had no intention, I can assure you, of becoming a blogger when—less than a month ago—I posted my first update in my daughter’s stead.
Many of you have thanked me for continuing to post. Surely you have noticed that I lack a certain quality that made this site so popular and its author so well loved. I ain’t Nattie…OK? (Insert smile, here.)
Sometimes, we parents tend to think of our children as extensions of ourselves. Although we know better, we expect them to adopt our friends, adapt our logic, to assess their situations and make their decisions in the same ways we would. This, however, is rarely, if ever, the case.
Our offspring are the products of their genes and environments, not ours. My Natalie did not get her sweet optimistic spirit from me.
But Natalie isn’t blogging anymore. And, now, the updating is done. Although we will continue to grieve indefinitely, we have said our goodbyes. her “Hobbit House” is empty, her accounts closed, her books donated to her church and her library.
Jonathan and Anna miss their Mom, to be sure, but they now live with their dad and look forward to their birthdays in July.
All we have left are memories, a few photographs…and her written words. All I have left to say is a polar opposite to what you have come to expect to read, here.
I know that Nat is having the time of her life, but all I want to talk about is how unhappy I am. I feel sorry for myself—to say nothing of her mom, her kids, her extended family and all her friends—because the world just isn’t the same without her.
Because many people still visit daily, I don’t intend to remove this blog anytime soon. Fortunately, I am a minority investor in the box that serves the site, and the domain is registered for a few more years.
But I also know that those readers will soon fade away if new material is not added frequently, so I had an idea…
Thanks to Heather, Joanne and Cynthia from W@H, and the internet “Wayback Machine,” I have the posts published on the original “Nattie Writes,” dating back to mid-2003.
I also have some things she wrote in the years before blogging became such an important part of her life and yours.
If you would like me to periodically post this material—some of it previously published, and some of it not—let me know. Otherwise, I cannot imagine that you would be interested in anything more that I could add.
Thanks for caring! (((((Y’all!)))))

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(Originally published on Monday, June 18, 2007)
I owe a debt of gratitude to each of you for your good wishes and wonderful comments in Nattie’s memory. I also received the following by “snail mail,” and now pass it along to you, her friends worldwide. (Thanks to Joy; credit to Hallmark)—Nattie’s Daddy

A rose may lose its bloom,
But still the fragrance lingers long.
A bird may fly away,
yet we can still recall its song.

So when someone who is loved departs
to join the Lord above,
They’ll live and laugh and be with us
in memories of love.

“Your days of mourning will come to an end.”—Isaiah 60:20 (MLT)

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(Originally published on Friday, June 15, 2007)
The sky was clear, the sun was bright and the grass was dusty. A small group of Carters, Wootens and Yorks gathered this morning to say our ceremonial goodbyes to Nattie’s earthly remains. Her grandmother Julia read the following words:

We know this small urn holds no “ordinary” ashes, darling. They’re all we have left of your beautiful life, and we’ve come to place them where we knew you’d want them most of all—near your beloved Grandma and Grandpa Wooten.
And, no, that isn’t all we have left—we have beautiful memories of your valiant spirit, your wonderful testimony of faith and trust in God, and your radiant triumph over all the pain life brought you.
The word “beautiful” has been used with purpose—that is how we will always remember you—our beautiful little girl…our Natalie Rose.
Rest in peace, darling; we’ll see you “in the morning.”

Then we took some pictures, exchanged a few more words and tearful hugs, and went our separate ways. Angel and Karla are helping Mary clean out the “hobbit house” apartment.
Four weeks ago today, Natalie phoned to tell me she was sick. What happened?—Nattie’s Daddy

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(Originally published on Thursday, June 14, 2007)
(Written the day before her surgery; Natalie passed on a week and a half later.)
Dear Jonathan,
You are my first-born, my precious baby boy. You have gotten so big I can’t believe you are almost as tall as me or that you’ll be 9 this July.
I want you to know that I love you. I know I haven’t always been the best mommy but know this much—no matter what—I will always love you.
You are such an amazing little guy. Never stop dreaming, imagining or being creative. I know that if you want to you can be a great artist someday. You already are an artist.
Believe in yourself. I do.
Again, I love you. Never forget that.

Mommy
5/26/07
Dear Anna,
My sweet baby girl—being your mom has been a joy.
I am only sorry that I’ve been sick so much of your life. I’m sorry that we haven’t cuddled more, that you haven’t read more to me. You are such a smart little girl. Yes, I called you a little girl because even though you are almost 7—you are my baby girl.
You are going to do just fine—in school and in life.
Never forget that mommy loves you, and so does God.
Butterfly kisses and hugs,
Mommy
5/26/07
Copyright Natalie Rose York

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